Back in the mid 1960's my high school principal, Sister Mary, used to tell us again and again, "Dare to be different!" Following the crowd and giving in to peer pressure is a strong force in high school, but her wisdom to fight against the thinking of the crowd is good for all of life. Dare to be different! I took that advice and became a priest 34 years ago next month. Talk about being different! Being a priest is rare indeed and it's feeling like we priests are becoming extinct like dinosaurs. And 31 years ago I became a pastor; and I can tell you that being a pastor used to be easier. It has become enormously difficult by the demands of our times in terms of competencies I did not have and do not really want to have. To meet the needs of today, I feel like I should have gotten an MBA.
Pastoring also used to be easier when the community of faith loved the faith and loved the Church, when people knew the faith at least enough to know who Moses was, who Adam and Eve were and what the 10 Commandments are. It was easier when parishioners had believing relatives and had friendships with people of faith. It was easier when people were supportive of the mission of the Church.
There’s a hint of the way it used to be if your parish has a Catholic school, but even then, many of the school families see religious practice as optional and occasional. Their hearts are not “in it” the way “it used to be.”
Way too many people do not know the faith, and do not seem to care too much about Church, as long as they can feel somehow spiritual. Maybe this is only true in Boulder, Colorado but I don’t think so. There are so many aspects of our culture that impinge upon us to harm our development as genuinely human beings, like our hyper-individualism, our imperative to be self-sufficient, our craving for privacy, and the devil’s deceit of consumerism. But for me, there is an even more insidious poison that at the same time threatens, and ensures by God’s grace, my development as a human being.
I’m more alarmed than I ever have been. I am more aware of feeling like I am, and we – all of us - are walking along a precipice with only the Lord’s grace keeping us from falling into some abyss. I see that whole generations are lost from the faith, that the vast sea of younger Catholics doesn’t have a clue as to who Jesus is and what He calls us to. Doesn't it seem like one body blow after another? If it’s not some scandal, then it’s people choosing their political devotion over and against their hunger for the Eucharist (because of the Catholic stance of devotion to the sanctity of life in the womb), or it’s moral confusion, or another drop in Mass attendance, or a growing preference for spirituality without the "burdens" of religion, or increasing costs, aging buildings and decreasing income, and on and on. In my parish it takes three Sunday collections just to pay the health care benefits for our faculty and staff. But, I am told, "Don't dare talk about money!" Talk about “pastoral despair!”
My challenge as a human being has been to remain hopeful, to become kinder and gentler, less judgmental, more loving, fearless, to be a cause of joy instead of a cynical wet blanket. “Without Me, you can do nothing,” says the Lord to me. And I know this truth now to the core of my being. Instead of my thinking I am invincible and able to accomplish so much, I think more in line with the psalm that says, “Let those who hope in You not be put to shame through me, Lord of hosts: let not those who seek You be dismayed through me, God of Israel.” (Ps. 69:7).
Though this insidious cultural poison threatens me, it also ensures me of my human development by God’s grace. How can that be? Because I finally know my nothingness, somewhat like Mary in the Magnificat: “He has regarded His servant in her nothingness.” Knowing our nothingness does not mean "poor self esteem" but means being totally open to God, for God is the One who can do all. As for me, I realize that I am but a mere creature, not anything more. This is one of the great tasks of mid-life: to know that we are but a mere creature before the Almighty. I used to look at what I considered successes, like a few buildings and a few programs, and now I see that “my” successes are but so much straw. If I feel successful about anything, it’s that I have passed this test, by God’s grace, and learned the lesson the Lord would have me learn. I feel like I have finally come to the heart of the matter for my life: to be but a vessel of God’s grace, a humble shepherd of souls, relying totally on the Lord. Now that is truly different. At least for me.
So, thanks be to God for Sister Mary and her wise advice way back in high school: dare to be different!
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