Merry Christmas. I hope and pray that this Christmas will help you become even more aware of the love of God than ever before.
One year ago on December 26th I came down with bacterial meningitis, which almost killed me. I was in a coma for 5 days and everyone around me had heard very well the medical opinion that I was most likely going to die or be brain dead. What happened over those days was the most powerful experience of my life. I encountered the Triune God, in a deep down convincing way.
During those five days I saw, as if from the eyes of God, all kinds of scenes of human suffering. I say “as if from the eyes of God” because I saw all of that while being in great peace. When the medical team started bringing me out of the coma, a nurse, I later found out, had been saying to me, “Now you go and meditate.”
I remember thinking, “Meditate! Of course! I know how to meditate. Why have I not been meditating?” And so I began praying, “Lord Jesus, Son of God have mercy on me.” Until I became very aware of the presence of the Lord Jesus. It was an extraordinary experience, but you know, I met Him whom I already knew.
As I continued to pray, the Lord took me on a tour of all those scenes of human suffering that I had been seeing vividly for 5 days; and now they were all covered with what looked like crimson lacework. I knew this was His blood. He told me that no one suffers alone; He is with everyone who suffers, and He suffers with them. This is the way He loves us, sharing our burdens and sorrows.
He told me then to pray to the Father, and so I prayed, “Abba, Father,” over and over again. Now remember, St. Paul tells in Romans 8 that no one can pray, “Abba Father” unless by the Holy Spirit.
So, here I was, caught up into the very life the Most Holy Trinity! I became aware of unbelievable love, love like I never knew before. Love that is beyond words; and attempting to describe it is impossible, and even the attempt cheapens it.
All year long I have been mulling over this experience, absorbing it more and more, letting it inform everything that I think and do. I now understand more truly how St. John the Evangelist could say, “God is love; and wherever there is love, there is God.”
Think of this, brothers and sisters: what we celebrate tonight is illogical, a madness, beyond-comprehending, that God who created all that is would humble Himself to take on our lowly human flesh and become one of us, to lead us out of our unloving ways, our self-absorbed ways, our self-made prisons into the ever growing awareness that “God is love.”
The Incarnation is what gives me meaning to everything I do and everything I experience. God is very real to me. God has revealed Himself to me and to all of us in the God-man, Jesus Christ. He is not one among many ways; He and He alone is the Way. And His way is the way of love, love that is willing to suffer with anyone who suffers.
Christianity is not a way to cope with suffering, though it does give meaning to suffering when we encounter it. But Christianity is so much more. It is letting the Lord into our inner being to guide us to share the burdens of others, to love as He loves.
I have spent a year reflecting on all that happened to me; and what has dawned on me is that deep down, at the core of my being, when I was utterly helpless and even unconscious, I cried out, “Abba, Father.” The Father shows us that Jesus is the fulness of what it means to be human. So, brothers and sisters, join with me. Let us keep watching Him, all year long, in every Gospel proclaimed, especially at Mass. Let us watch Him to see how He reacts to every situation put before Him. And the more astute we become at seeing how He reacts, we too will know how to react to the situations of our lives.
May God the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit enlarge your minds and souls to make room for Him who was born in a manger because there was no room for Him when He came in the flesh.
Comments